No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
