You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Randomize