I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize