just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
