I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
