quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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