Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Randomize
