why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
