And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
Semen is not good for contacts.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
