Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
