Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
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