doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
