white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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