He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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