yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
