My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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