I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Randomize