You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Randomize
