the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
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