the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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