It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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