dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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