I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize