Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize
