After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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