hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Randomize
