hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
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