I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
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