Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
