Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Randomize
