I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
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