Having a random hookup so left but love u
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Randomize
