Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Holy sore nipples Batman
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Randomize
