i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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