He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
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