Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
