I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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