I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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