Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Randomize
