NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
porn star boner night. come get it.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
Randomize
