I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
