Do you still have your period?
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Randomize
