Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
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