apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
I got her a Nickelback box set.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
