at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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