theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
