and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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