How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Randomize
