Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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