As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
