I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
