WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
